The one in which I learn to hate T ball…

I like baseball. I love the sounds of baseball, specifically if it is being listened to on the radio while someone is washing the car and there is a cold beer glistening on the step nearby. The hum of the cicada in the background, the buzz of a lawn mower in the distance. The sounds of summer.

I hate T ball. This is our first year experiencing the exquisite torture that is the one hour of T ball. And I am pretty sure my kid feels the same way.

The glove is for what?

Spinning in the outfield. Similar to spinning in soccer, but with a hat and glove.

And finally giving up and just laying down.

If he isn’t doing these things, he is doing this (he is in the center of the picture being spoken to by The Bob):

The problem is, you see, that 4 – 6 year olds, with a few spectacularly talented can hit and throw like they are in Little League already exceptions, are not any good at baseball. And no one expects them to be. But this means that those batting take FOR.EVER to hit the ball, and the ones out in the field, who barely understand the difference between first base and a sandwich are B.O.R.E.D. Which leads to spinning, laying about, goofing around and generally not listening or paying attention.

Two weeks ago Cooper was so bored and got so sassy with me about doing what the coach was telling him to do I ejected him from the game myself. I gave him 2 chances to get off the ground and go up to bat, and he chose to first tell me “I caaaaaaan’t heeeeaaaaar yooooouuuu” and then lay down in the grass between second and third base again. So we left. Because while I don’t particularly care if he is any good at anything he does, I do expect he will listen to the adults in charge and follow basic instructions.

I want him to experience team sports, and if eventually he tells me he does or does not want to play again, we will do what he wants. But Lord have mercy I dread this hour where it seems like it is one long discussion about just paying attention. We have two more “games” this season, and I have already told The Bob that unless Cooper expresses a distinct interest in it next season, we may be sticking to just soccer, and possibly clown school.

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